Trusted Hearts
by Isabelle8888
Summary: Jason and Sam Song Fic & One shots. A Collection of my stuff. Each chapter is a different one shot with A different storyline.
1. I could fall in love

..............

Sam sat in front of the window in the guest bedroom where she stayed. It was a dark night and the moon was low enough for her to see. She smiled at the peaceful sky and touched her stomach. She was beginning to show and she felt the baby kick, bring tears to her eyes.

She was so glad to become a mother, she never realized that something so big was missing from her life till it happened. She was grateful to Sonny for making this child with her but she lately she's spent a lot of time thinking, realizing she didn't need Sonny's love, she didn't need him. They would never have a life together and that was a relief but she couldn't understand why.

The whole Penthouse was quite and dim. She heard the front door open and knew Jason was home, she smiled. Another thing that confused her, why Jason coming home made her feel happy, happy to know he was safe.

" Hey." Jason said from the frame of her door. Sam looked away from the window and at him, it was dark but she saw his eyes.

" Hey. What's going on?" Sam asked as she turned in her seat, facing him. She felt something in her chest, a heavy fluttering feeling. What was going on? She wondered as she continued to look at Jason with the dim light of the moon and the hallway light.

" I just wanted to make sure you're ok before I leave." Jason explained.

" You're leaving again?" Sam asked, hearing the distress in her own voice. She was taken back by it, the twinge of pain she felt of the thought he get hurt.

" I have some business to take care of. I'll be back later." Jason said to reinsure her. He saw her face clearly, the worry lines that appeared. He was glad to know she cared but he knew it wasn't good for the baby for her to worry.

Sam looked down at her lap, seeing her little belly where her baby grew. She realized she didn't want the baby to grow up without Jason. She wanted him in the baby's and her life.

" Just be careful Jason." Sam said, continuing to look down.

Jason felt a ping of guilt deep in his heart. He hated when someone worried about him because that meant they cared. It hit him, Sam cares. That froze him, he couldn't move, that realization was a little frightening because he never thought in a million years that Samantha McCall would care about him because she was in love with Sonny and she disliked Jason, right?

" You care." Jason said.

" Well yeah. Of curse I care about you. Do you really think I would've agreed to stay with you and we rise this baby together if I didn't care and trust you?" Sam explained as she without thinking about it, stood from her seat and walked up to him.

**__**

I could lose my heart tonight

If you don't turn and walk away

'Cause the way I feel I might

Lose control and let you stay

'Cause I could take you in my arms

And never let go

" We agreed to this because there wasn't many other options." Jason pointed out. Sam was making him nervous, nothing made him nervous.

" Jason I'm not a little kid, I run my own life. I could've left or I could've told the truth but I wanted this." Sam explained as she locked eyes with Jason.

**__**

I could fall in love with you

I could fall in love with you

" You wanted what?" Jason asked in just above a whisper.

Sam laughed nervously. No turning back, she thought. " Did you ever wonder why before the baby when we were around each other I just told you everything I could in that small time?" she asked.

" I just figured you liked to talk." Jason answered.

" Not to everyone. You were really annoying and I hated how you treated me like just a job but you listened and I liked that. Like turned into trust and the thought of rising a child with you didn't seem so bad. It sounded nice so I said yes. And during these past days I've really started to like you, not what you do for me, who you are." Sam explained. She felt like a dork for admitting all of this to him because now it would change everything.

She couldn't lose Jason, she just hoped he wasn't too freaked out about what she told him. She waited fro him to say something. He was thinking of what she said but he didn't show anything hint to what he thought about it.

" I like you too." Jason said.

**__**

I could only wonder how

Touching you would make me feel

But if I take that chance right now

Tomorrow will you want me still?

So I should keep this to myself

And never let you know

" Really?" Sam asked with joy in her voice. She felt like a little kid that just found out she could get a dog. She looked into Jason's blue eyes, she loved his eyes.

Jason smiled at her and said. " Really." it was such a different moment for him. He couldn't remember the last time everything just felt right and he wasn't worried. He didn't think about it too long, he did what he felt. He run his fingers down the side of her face.

**__**

I could fall in love with you

I could fall in love with you

Sam closed her eyes for second to his touch. They looked into each others eyes, asking a different million questions and both wondered if this was the right thing to do. Jason brought his hand to the nape of her neck and pulled her closer till their lips finally touched.

**__**

And I know it's not right

And I guess I should try to do what I should do

But I could fall in love

Fall in love with you

I could fall in love with you

Their lips touched, a new electrifying feeling surged through their bodies. As if asking for permission their lips waited on top of one another's for was seemed like eternity before they finally explored each others moths, tasting every inch.

**__**

So I should keep this to myself

And never let you know

Sam brought her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. Jason's arms went around her waist. Their mouth surged with desire but not for just sex, just for each other. A time together to grow together.

**__**

I could fall in love with you

I could fall in love with you

I could fall in love

I could fall in love

With you...

...............

AN: What did you think? I liked it because it doesn't seem too far fetched. I could see this happening on GH. I didn't want it to be about ever lasting love because they haven't reached that point, that takes time so I wrote something I could see happening soon. A girl can hope: )

Thanks

Isabelle

Song:Selena- I could fall in love


	2. My wish come true

AN: Another one shot. This is how I wanted everything to play out when Jason got back to PC. Read and Review and most of all enjoy: )

…………  
  
She felt alone. Even with a life growing inside of her. A matter of days and her life became more complicated and hurtful. She just wanted to be free, of everything. She wanted to be happy again. To never cry of sadness again but Sam McCall stopped wishing after awhile because they never came true.  
  
Now she sat alone in a tiny jail cell at the Port Charles police department. She knew soon they would come and take her away from the only place she felt like she had a home.   
  
It wasn't all bad, she had happiness. She also met the one person she would never forget. He was there when no one else was. He believed in her when she didn't believe in herself. It happened so fast, he came into her life over night and now he would be gone just as fast. Of course she knew he wouldn't abandon her in jail but once that wasn't taken care of, he would leave. There was no need for him to stay any longer because the whole truth was out.  
  
It was surprising to know out of everyone she's ever met, he stood out. She'd miss him the most. She smiled at the thought of him and everything he was. Loyal, generous, caring, unselfish, honest, and not too bad on the eyes, she had to admit. She might've been in love with another but she wasn't blind.   
  
He had the most caring eyes she'd ever seen. This is crazy, she thought. Why was she thinking of him of all people? Yes she was going to miss him but that still didn't explain why the thought of his face made everything seem a little better. Why the memories only they shared were at the surface of her brain.  
  
It hit her awhile ago, when she decided to tell him the whole truth, that she did care for him. He was the only one she trusted with her secrets. She knew he would do the right thing and for that she would always be grateful to Jason Morgan.  
  
Sam laid back on the thin mattress and counted the endless hours to come.  
-  
  
Jason just got back to Port Charles. Setting Danny up took longer then he thought it would've. He was headed back to the safe house to let Sam know how her brother was and to make sure she and the baby were alright as well. He was relieved to know her biggest secret was the fact she was covering for her brother, he admired it. Because it was something he would do for those he loved. They were more alike then not. That came as a surprise because he was sure no one could understand let alone be they same way in so many ways.  
  
Jason reached the safe house, opened the door, and saw that it was pretty quite. " Sam!" he called out. But he knew there wasn't going to be an answer, he turned around and headed to Harbor View towers for some answers.  
  
Once he stepped out of the elevator, Max opened the door to Sonny's Penthouse.   
  
" Jason, you're finally back." Carly exclaimed from her seat on the sofa, next to her husband.   
  
" Where were you?" Sonny had asked.  
  
" I had to take care of something." Jason answered. It wasn't a lie but it wasn't the full truth. Sam trusted him to keep her secret and that meant not telling anyone. Not even his best friend/boss and the man Sam was in love with.  
  
Sonny nodded, wanting more answers but he figured Jason was being silent because Carly was there. " What's up?" he asked.  
  
" I went to the safe house and Sam's gone. What's going on?" Jason asked as he crossed his arms and stood close to the door.  
  
" You don't know." Carly said with regret in her voice. Jason should've been told even if he wasn't the father of the baby, he was still watching over Sam.  
  
" Ric found her. They're holding her at PCPD--" Sonny didn't get another word out because Jason left. " I should've called him but I had no idea where he went." he said.  
  
" Sonny do you think it was a good idea for Jason to watch after Sam?" Carly asked as her mind began to think of possibilities.  
  
" Why?"  
  
" Because the way Jason just left. I'd say something's happening."  
-  
Sam heard light footsteps walking down the aisle of cells. She figured the guards were changing shifts. She was right because a police officer walked past her cell, wearing a cap. He stopped. Sam looked at him but she couldn't see his face.  
  
" Can I help you?" Sam asked as she sat up.  
  
" You didn't really think I was going to leave you in here, did you?" Jason asked as he finally reviled his face.   
  
Caring blue eyes, Sam smiled as she stood and walked toward him. " Well I didn't know when I'd see you again so--I was pretty sure I was stuck here." she answered. She looked him from head to toe, the uniform was working." So I guess you have a plan."   
  
" I'm getting you out of here. I know you don't want to leave Port Charles but you have to trust me on this." Jason softly explained so he couldn't be overheard.  
  
" I do trust you Jason, you should know that by now. I didn't want to leave before because Danny was here but you took care of that. So now I'll do whatever you think is best." Sam explained as she found herself avoiding his eyes when she use to go to them for comfort. But now when she looked at him, her insides fluttered.  
  
" That's good to hear." Jason said as he bent down and opened the bag he had brought with him. " Here. Put this on." he said as he handed Sam another police uniform.  
  
" How did you--?"  
  
" I'll explain later. Just hurry up before someone comes." Jason explained.  
  
" Ok, turn around." Sam told him once she had the items in her hand.  
  
Jason just smiled and did as told.   
  
" So where are we going?" Sam asked as she changed.  
  
" I don't know. Where do you want to go?" Jason asked as he kept his back turned. Also watching out for anyone coming. He had a plan but he didn't have enough time to work out every detail.  
  
" I don't really care as long it's away from this jail cell and this mess." Sam answered.  
  
" What do you want me to tell Sonny?" Jason asked. The mood became a little more serious with that question.  
  
Sam sighed as she finished getting ready. She walked back to the bars. " You can turn around now." Once Jason was facing her she explained her thought, her feelings. " I'm not going to keep this child from Sonny, he's the father. But the birth is months away, enough time to leave and work out this murder conviction. He and Carly are back together, I don't want him to worry about me anymore. Tell him what you want but if your asking what I want. I don't want Sonny to know where I'm not. Not now anyway, I need to work something's out." she explained.  
  
" What does that mean? You want time alone to get over Sonny?" Jason asked.  
  
" It means I'm glad he and Carly worked it out because they deserve each other. It means I have moved on. It hurts, yeah because I was in love with him but that'll soon fade too. I want to live for me and my daughter." Sam explained. Saying it and thinking it were two different things because now she felt like a ton of bricks had been lifted from her shoulders.   
  
" It sounds like you have it all worked out." Jason said as he began to open the cell door.  
  
" Jail. It's a good place to think." Sam said as she now stood in front of Jason. " Thanks, for everything."  
  
" Thank me once I get you out of all of this." Jason said as he pulled a cap over her head. " Follow my lead."  
  
Jason and Sam walked down the long hall way that lead into the main offices of the police department. Ric Lansing was in court for the next hour, that was a good thing. They walked side by side, appearing to be partners on their way out. Sam had no idea it would be this easy. She knew once Jason got back into town get would get her out.   
  
They reached outside, fresh air. No one looked twice at them as they walked down the sidewalk. A couple of blocks later, the get away car.  
  
" That was awesome." Sam said as she pulled off her cap. Once they were driving down the rode.  
  
Jason shot her a confused look. " Awesome?" he questioned.  
  
" So close to getting out but at any moment you could get caught. Come on Jase, that's a rush." Sam explained with a wide smile. She felt like she was alive, more alive then she's been in years.  
  
Jason just smiled at her because he didn't know what to say.   
  
" So we're hitting the rode." Sam pointed out as she stared out the window.  
  
" Yeah." Jason said as he kept his eyes on the rode. There was a huge relief of getting her out of jail. It was a joy, a feeling he hadn't felt in a long time. Lately Sam's been a surprise, a joy herself. A person he wanted to be around.  
  
" Just us." Sam gladly said as she looked at Jason's face.  
  
" Just us."  
  
………..

Isabelle 


	3. Lost in a portrait

Summary: A one shot of the ending of the 8-10-04 episode  
  
  
  
It was all finally over for Sam. Danny was safe, Ric couldn't charge Sonny nor Jason with anything. Everything was going well but for Sam something wasn't right. It didn't feel right. She sat on the sofa with her legs curled under her, pondering on her thoughts. She had been reading when Jason placed a blanket over her. Without too much thought she grabbed his hand and they smiled at each other.  
  
Ever since she's been thinking of what was going on.  
_  
**I analyze everything, I know what you mean  
I answer by questioning all that I need  
And I want to, to surrender  
I want you to see all the sides  
All the faces inside of me**  
_  
Sam turned as the front door opened, Jason was finally home. Lately every time she saw him, a deep breath was needed, as if bracing herself, for what?  
  
" Hey." Sam said as she watched Jason, as he does every night, place his keys down and search through the mail.  
  
" Hey, how are you feeling?" Jason asked as he finally looked at her. He glanced down at her large belly. It was so amazing to watch the miracle of life. When Sam decided to stay it made him happy because he didn't want to miss out on watching the baby grow, inside and out.  
  
" I'm good, thanks." Sam answered as she met his eyes. Lately she had been questioning everything and the only thing that made sense was oddly enough Jason and their relationship, whatever that may be.  
  
**_I see I'm not perfect, but that's all I see  
Lost in a portrait, in a picture of me  
This can't be everything I see  
That my canvas is incomplete  
Your color's everything to me  
And my canvas will set me free_**  
  
Jason went and sat beside Sam on the sofa, their eyes still mirroring each others. " Are you okay?" he asked concerned.  
  
" I'm fine. With everything finally over, how can I not be fine?" Sam asked, trying to lighten the mood but she didn't feel fine. It was a little surprising to see how easy Jason had picked up on her mood.  
  
" We've been living together for awhile and you tend to learn things about the person you live with. You might have been this great con woman before but now you're really bad at lying, at least with me." Jason explained with a light grin. He had made a promise to himself to always be there for Sam, as long as she'd let him.  
  
Sam sighed, she didn't understand where along the way Jason became such a huge part in her life but now he was. Something else to be confused about.  
  
" I don't know what's going on. Everything seems upside down." Sam admitted.  
_  
**My outline is solid and made up of crime  
And the things that you say just burn in my eyes  
I want to, to surrender  
I want you to find some comfort  
In the spaces between the lines**_  
  
" With everything going on maybe you're just confused because it isn't what you planned." Jason suggested.  
  
Sam studied him for a moment. Thinking of his words and how that didn't sound right either. " Meaning what?" she asked.  
  
" I'm sure when you thought of having a baby, you would've wanted to be with the father, the man you love. But you got the complete opposite and maybe you're still processing the difference." Jason explained.  
  
Sam looked down for a moment. " You think I feel off, confused, whatever it is, because I'm with you and not Sonny?" she asked.  
  
" Something like that." Jason answered.  
  
Sam looked back up, straight into his eyes. " You're wrong." she snapped at him.  
  
**_I see I'm not perfect, but that's all I see  
Lost in a portrait, in a picture of me  
This can't be everything I see  
That my canvas is incomplete  
Your color's everything to me_**  
  
Sam ran her hands through her hair and took a deep breath, calming herself from the sudden anger that rose within herself. " Jason you've been really great, more then I could say. I want this, remember? Whatever I might be feeling isn't because I'm here with you because that's the only thing that feels right." she admitted without even thinking of her words. She saw how Jason's expression change, as if shocked by view of the subject.  
  
" Then what feels wrong?" Jason softly asked.  
  
" I don't know." Sam said with a shrug as she rested her arms on her lap and sat forward. " Carly was here earlier and she accused me of wanting Sonny back. When she left, I thought about it. If Sonny came to me right now and told me he wanted me back and wanted to rise our child together--" she looked up. "--- I would have to say no." she softly admitted to him.  
  
" Then that's what you're stuck on. What you were so sure you wanted, you don't anymore." Jason explained. There was a surge of relief and joy to know she didn't want Sonny back, she wanted to stay with him.  
  
" Jason, what the hell is going on between us?" Sam asked as she searched his eyes for an answer.  
  
**_And my canvas will set me free  
This can't be everything I see  
That my canvas is incomplete  
Your color's everything to me_**  
  
" What do you mean?" Jason asked but he knew the answer.  
  
" Before you left, what happened. That wasn't just a simple nice thing to do. It felt different. We agreed to this because we were so sure nothing would ever happen, no feelings toward each other, there was no way to hurt each other. But that's changed because there's feelings." Sam explained. She felt as if any second she might burst but that was better then keeping her feelings locked up.  
  
" I know what you mean but Sam whatever it is, we have to get over it." Jason explained, now avoiding her deep brown eyes.  
  
" What? So you admit something has changed between us but it shouldn't?" Sam asked.  
  
" Right." Jason said with a nod.  
  
" That's stupid and I don't get it. This isn't the time to use very little words, start speaking Jason." Sam said with a frustrated sigh.  
  
" Sam you were in love with Sonny, he cares about you. We could never be anything more then friends." Jason explained. What caught him off guard was the fact he hated telling her that because he wished it wasn't true.  
  
" Because you think it would be betraying him?"  
  
" It would be."  
  
" No it wouldn't. Sonny doesn't own me or you. I'm not sure on what's going on but it has nothing to do with Sonny and everything to do with us. Stop thinking about what he might think and tell me what you feel." Sam said.  
  
" Sam I don't know, maybe it wasn't best to talk about this---" Jason began but he was cut off as Sam grabbed him by the shirt and kissed him hard on the lips. It didn't take long for his body to respond and kiss her back.  
  
**_This can't be everything I see  
That my canvas is incomplete  
You color's everything to me  
And my canvas will set me free  
This can't be everything I see_**  
  
Suddenly all the confusion faded because it lead them to the moment they had been dreaming about for the last couple of days. New feelings developed without either realizing it, suspecting it. Something that sounded so confusing felt so right.  
  
" Now what do you feel?" Sam asked as she let him go.  
  
" I feel like I should kiss you again and forget about everyone and everything else." Jason said just before he kissed her again.  
  
**_That my canvas is incomplete  
Your color's everything to me  
You're everything to me_**  
  
  
  
Isabelle  
  
Artist: Trapt Lyrics  
Song: Lost in a Portrait Lyrics


	4. You

Summary: My version of Friday's episode (9-3-04) Of General Hospital.

" You living with Jason -- it's just -- it's just a bad idea." Sonny said as he paced his best friends living.

" Jason has been wonderful, selfless. He loves this baby like his own. Why is that so threatening to you?" Sam asked. She was growing more and more impatient with the man before her, the man she use to love. Lately every time she saw him it just became this big fight.

" Living with Jason, getting involved with Jason, whatever --"

" Whoa, there is nothing going on between me and Jason. We're friends who share the same feelings toward this baby, wanting to give her the best life we can. Jason has been nothing but great, I don't understand why this is bothering you so much. We're over Sonny, even if me and Jason did get involved- not that it would happen- it shouldn't bother you." Sam explained. She thought about her words, even if? No, she and Jason would never be more then friends. She didn't even want to, right?

" No matter what, no one will take my place in my daughters life." Sonny said in a low voice.

" No one wants to Sonny!" Sam said for the hundredth time. " She's your child but Jason's going to be just involved in her life. He's been there Sonny for every second of this pregnancy. And he's going to continue to be." Sam explained, placing her hands on her hips. She decided it was over. This was going to be the last time she had this conversation with Sonny.

" Why? It's not his place--"

" Because I want him to!" Sam snapped. She looked into Sonny's eyes. " Jason--makes me feel safe. He makes me feel period. He's doesn't hurt me, all he wants to do is be there for this child." she explained, placing her right hand over her growing belly.

Sonny sighed. " Sam the truth is out. I can be there for you and our child. Not all the time but I can be involved." he explained.

" I don't want you to." Sam softly said. " Sonny I was so in love with you and it hurt to see you. But it doesn't anymore. Our time together was great and we have a little girl from it. I want you involved in her life but not mine. I don't love you anymore Sonny." she explained. Feeling a sense of relief to finally say the words. She wasn't sure about her emotions but the last couple of days, she became sure.

Sonny looked at Sam, into her eyes. " Are you falling in love with Jason?" he asked in a emotionless tone. He never loved Sam the way she needed to be. But he couldn't handle Jason and Sam together, romantically. He couldn't even handle them living together. He didn't want Sam back but he didn't want Jason to have her either.

Sam looked at Sonny, she was actually going to answer. To tell him the whole truth but the front door opened. " Hello." Sam said as she looked at Jason then back to Sonny. " I'll give you guys some time alone. We're done here." she said to him before she headed upstairs.

" What's going on?" Jason asked as he shut the front door and walked closer to Sonny.

Sonny's face showed every inch of anger he was feeling at that moment. " It's nothing. How did it go?" he asked. The last thing he wanted was to talk about was Sam and what was happening with her and Jason.

" I haven't found him yet but I will." Jason explained, referring to Justus.

" Get on it Jason. We've wasted enough time on this. You're slipping, you should've found Justus and Faith by now. I think you have too much on your mind." Sonny explained.

" What do you mean?" Jason asked.

" Sam. You're getting too close. You're thinking about her needs before what needs to be done, business. If you can't handle your job, I'll find someone who will." Sonny explained and without another word, he left.

Jason stood there and sighed. " You shouldn't have listened to that. It's business it has nothing to do with you Sam." he explained with his back facing her.

Sam walked down the remaining stairs. " But I'm glad I did." she now faced Jason. " Sonny was mad and I was scared--"

" Scared what?" Jason asked, looking into her eyes.

She quickly looked away from his eyes. And said in the best strong tone she could. " He was upset and I didn't want him to take it out on you." Sam explained as she walked over to the sofa and sat down.

" What happened while I was gone?" Jason asked as he went and stood near the sofa. He saw by her eyes and Sonny's attitude, something happened.

" Jason---it was horrible. This is really bothering him." Sam explained. Quickly glancing at his face then back down at the coffee table.

" What is?" Jason asked. Sitting on the armrest of the east chair on the side of the sofa.

" This. Us. I mean--not that there's an us. What we want to do for this baby. Give her a stable life. I think Sonny feels threaten that you might take his place in her life." Sam explained.

" That will never happen. He just--"

" It already has. Jason out of everything in this world there's one thing I'm sue of. You'll always be there for my daughter. And for that I owe you everything." Sam explained, feeling the urge to cry but she fought it. Damn hormones, she thought.

" Sam you don't owe me anything." Jason said.

Sam smiled. " Of course you would say that. It's just the way you are. I guess that's the way you and Sonny are different, he uses people till he doesn't need them anymore. All you want to do is help and let everyone be their self's." she explained.

" What else happened with Sonny? You look really…upset." Jason explained.

" I'm not upset Jason. I'm actually kind of glad. I finally ended it with Sonny. There's nothing else there. All we share is a child but no feeling, you know. I told him I didn't love him anymore." Sam explained.

" That's good." Jason said. " Now it won't hurt you as much to see him." he quickly added when he realized how it sounded before.

" Yeah I know what you mean. I just wish I could put everything from the past in a little jar and toss it into the pier. I just want to look to the future. I can't wait till she's born and I can just focus on her. Screw everything else." Sam explained. Meaning love, it just got her into to trouble. But she couldn't get away from it no matter how hard she tried.

" It's good everything is looking better for you. You can be happy." Jason said with a small smile. There was more he wanted to say. Words in his mind that shocked him to his very core. Words that could never be spoken.

" Thanks to you." Sam said as she stood from her seat on the sofa.

" Sam you really don't have to---"

" I know I keep saying thanks. But that's because I feel I have to say something. It's gratitude. Sonny took it the wrong way. He asked if I was in love--" Sam explained. She took two steps forward and somehow tripped.

" Whoa." Jason said as he grabbed her.

"---With you." Sam finished as she stared into Jason's blue eyes.

" What did you say?" Jason asked in almost a whisper as he looked back into her eyes. It wasn't the first time he stared into her deep brown eyes but this time was different.

" I didn't say anything." Sam said. It was becoming a little hard to breath. Her body was all too aware that his hands were touching her and still were.

" What would you have said?" Jason asked. He didn't want to let her go, he didn't want to stop looking in her eyes. He didn't want the happiness deep within his body to ever leave. That happiness was her.

Sam moved her hand from his arm and touched the side of his face. A second later she kissed him. He kissed her back. A soft sweet kiss that slowly deepened. Sam pulled away and looked back into his blue eyes.

She smiled. " I would've said yes."

Isabelle 


	5. Could it be any harder

AN: I had this in my head as a 'what if' on GH. I would never want this to happen but I felt I had to write it. It's very sad so if you're not in the mood for more sadness, don't read.

Could it be any Harder

Jason waited outside of the O.R room where the doctors were working on Sam and the baby. His chest felt tight with worry, he couldn't lose them, he couldn't. the day started out so wonderful. Sam was so happy, Jason remembered the bright smiles on her face as she talked about the future. He loved how bright her eyes got, how she included him in everything. It made him more happy then he could imagine when he thought of a future with Sam and the baby.

Pulling Jason out of his deep thoughts was the loud cry coming from the room, the baby. Steven Webber exited the room and walked right up to him.

Steven saw Jason's questioning eyes and got right to the point. "The baby's fine., we got her out just in time. She's being cleaning up then taken to the nursery where she'll be monitored just in case." he explained.

A large piece of relief covered Jason's heart. But he could read people, seeing them through their eyes, something was wrong. "What about Sam?" he slowly asked.

Steven let out a sigh because this was never easy. "She bleed a lot, she's very weak. Right now we're doing everything we can to get her blood pressure and vitals up. But right now it doesn't look good." he explained.

Jason couldn't say anything, he felt the hot tears prick his eyes. He was slight for a moment before he looked Steven in the eye. "I can't lose her. Do whatever you have to do but she can't die." his voice was full of anger and pain.

"We're doing our best." Steven said. It was a silent promise that that everything was being done and then some.

"The baby, can I see her?" Jason asked.

"Once she's taken up to the nursery I'll come back and let you go see her." Steven explained before he walked away.

Jason wasn't alone for long, Sonny and Carly walked right up to him. He saw the worry in Sonny's eyes, the questioning look of how bad it is. Jason just wanted to close his eyes and make it all go away. For it to just be one big nightmare. "The baby's ok." Jason said to the couple.

Sonny let out a sigh of relief as he placed his hand over his chest. "I talked to Webber a bit earlier, he filled me in on what happened. So everything's ok?" he asked.

Jason swallowed hard because he wanted so bad for everything to be ok. "The baby was out in time and Steven said she'll be fine. But S-s…Sam might die. She bleed out and now she's very weak and it doesn't look good." he explained. The hot tears became fire as he crossed his arms.

"Oh my god." Escaped Carly's mouth.

Sonny didn't say anything, he didn't know what to say. He was so glad the baby was ok but sad because Sam didn't deserve to die. He just prayed she would be ok and make it through this. "Where's the baby now?" he softly asked Jason.

"They're taking her for some tests to make sure everything's ok then the nursery." Jason flatly explained. His mind was elsewhere, his mind was with Sam. He wondered if she was thinking and if she was, about what? He hoped she wasn't in pain that somewhere away from here she was in dreamland happy. That her thoughts would help her fight to stay alive.

"Jason---" Sonny softly said.

Jason finally looked at his friend.

"Are you okay?" Sonny asked as he looked into Jason's eyes, how tense he looked.

Jason nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine." he said the words but he couldn't feel them. He felt so lost and hurt because this wasn't how it was suppose to be. Sam wasn't suppose to be dying. She was suppose to give birth and hold her baby with a smile that would light up the night sky.

Steven walked up to the threesome. "If you want you can visit the baby. Sam's stable right now and she could have visitors right now but just for awhile." he explained.

Jason walked away from everyone without a word. He needed to see the baby and make sure she was really okay. He knew Sonny was the father but he could see her next. He needed to make sure Lila was okay so he could tell Sam what a wonderful job she did carrying her inside of her body.

He reached the nursery and saw the baby, she was awake and kicking at her blanket. She looked just like Sam. He wondered if she would be just as feisty as Sam, watch out world, he thought.

A nurse walked up to him. "Would you like to hold her?"

Jason didn't have the strength to answer her, he just nodded and followed her inside. It was a private nursery since the doctors were watching her closely. The nurse quietly stepped out of the room once she placed the tiny baby girl in Jason's arms.

Jason smiled at the little girl and her big brown eyes. "Your mom can't wait to meet you. It's all she's been talking about for the last couple of weeks. She's scared of not being a good mother but she'll be perfect because she loves you so much. And you'll love her too, it's hard not to." he softly explained, he placed tiny Lila back in her crib. "I'll see you later and hopefully so will your mom." he touched the little girl's cheek and left the room.

"How is she?" Sonny asked as he stood outside the nursery. It was only right to let Jason go in first because until now Jason was the father, the only man the baby knew.

"She's perfect. I'm going to go sit with Sam, you stay with the baby." Jason said, he placed his hand on Sonny's shoulders, still seeing the worry, then walked away.

Sam's room was silent except the 'beep' that came every couple of seconds. She lay there so still, she looked peaceful in Jason's eyes. He went and sat beside her bedside and grabbed her weightless hand. "I hope you can hear me because I need you to hear me. Sam you can't die because there's too much to live for. I saw the baby, she's so perfect and she looks just like you. She wants to see her mother, you have to wake up and make it through this." his voice was shaky as well as his hands. Jason couldn't remember a time he felt so scared.

"I thought there was time, but today showed me that isn't true. I thought in time everything would grow and it would become easy to till you how happy you made my life, how you filled it with joy. If you die that light is gone. I need you to hold on, I need you to fight, I know it's so easy to just let go but you can't." he held on tight to her hand, as if he held on long enough she'd be ok.

**__**

You left me with goodbye and open arms  
A cut so deep I don't deserve  
You were always invincible in my eyes  
the only thing against us now is time

"Sam--" Jason swallowed the river of tears. "If you--don't make it through this. Everything we talked about, everything you wanted for her, she will get. I'll always be there for your daughter. You wanted to give her everything you never had and more, she'll get it. But she could have the world but it won't mean anything if she didn't have her mother to love her everyday, to be there." he brought her hand to his lips and placed a light kiss across her fingers.

**__**

Could it be any harder to say goodbye and without you,  
Could it be any harder to watch you go, to face what's true  
If I only had one more day

I lie down and blind myself with laughter  
A quick fix of hope is what I'm needing  
And now I wish that I could turn back the hours  
But i know I just don't have the power

A beeping sound of a flat line ringed in his ears. "NO!." he yelled. "You can't leave me!" he yelled once more before he ran out the room and screamed at the doctor to help Sam live. He paced the outside of the room, waiting.

**__**

Could it be any harder to say goodbye and without you,  
Could it be any harder to watch you go, to face what's true  
If I only had one more day

Time seemed to be going so slow, every second felt like an hour. He prayed over and over for her to be okay. But there was this heavy weight on his chest that told him something was wrong and it couldn't be fixed. But Jason didn't want to think about that, to face what was in front of him. A time of memories flashed in his mind. When he found out Sam was pregnant, when she talked about the times she looked forward to. When he finally realized he loved her. The tears couldn't be fought now as the ran down his cheeks.

**__**

I'd jump at the chance  
We'd drink and we'd dance  
And I'd listen close to your every word,  
As if its your last, I know its your last,  
Cause today, oh, you're gone

Steven walked out of the room and faced him. Jason knew what he was going to say. "No. please no." he softly cried.

"I'm sorry Jason. We tried everything we could but the damage was beyond our repair. Sam didn't make it." Steven explained with a deep regret.

"No!" Jason yelled, a piercing yell that could be heard all over the hospital. "No, you try again! You save her damn it!" tears flooded his face as she yelled at the doctor.

The emotional Jason let out was enough to make Steven want to cry. "I'm sorry Jason but there's nothing we can do." he hated to say.

**__**

Could it be any harder to say goodbye and without,  
Could it be any harder to watch you go, to face what's true  
If I only had one more day

Jason paced the floor, crying and running his hand through his hair with anger.

"Do you want to say goodbye?" Steven asked. "You can sit with her for a little bit." he hoped that would help but he knew it wouldn't.

Jason went in and saw her, his sobs becoming deeper. He walked over to the bed and fell in the chair and across Sam. "I love you and you never knew, there was so much left for us to do and now it's all gone." he hugged her body.

**__**

Like sand on my feet  
The smell of sweet perfume  
You stick to me forever, baby  
and I wish you didn't go,  
I wish you didn't go  
I wish you didn't go away  
To touch you again,  
With life in your hands  
It couldn't be any harder

Jason held on tight to Sam's body, wishing it wasn't true. "Please, please come back to me. Come back!" but it didn't happen, he lost her forever.

Isabelle A.

Song:The calling- could it be any harder.


End file.
